Last couple of weeks have been hard. I've been emotionally unsettled because my baby girl was graduating from HS..don't know why...
I'm also short handed at work. Lost a great employee to an electric co-op where he plans to be an electrician/lineman and live closer to home and be near a girl he likes a lot. People at work are having to work out of their assigned work responsibilities... I've got a line on some good folks but right now things are frustrating.
I'm not organized right now. Out of rhythm... Feeling a little overwhelmed with a week of church camp coming, regular weekly required reports that have to be done are getting done late in the week. I've got a great groups of guys I'm going to play music with next week.. I'm really hoping that will help me get back in step. It did a world of good for me in February...this should be fun.
Anyway..I haven't been good the last couple of weeks, snickers bars, brownies, shiner, chips, bread, venti white chocolate mochas, ice cream, m&m's. I have not been good. I used food as a crutch instead of a gift from God.
I'm anxious because it's graduation time.. I got a pretty significant cut in pay last January and I just don't have the funds to hand out gifts like I did last year.. that hurts my heart. It's also my pride creeping in and jacking with me and tempting me to run more up on the credit card.. the agent of satan. Grrrr....
I've also pitched my "Rule of Life". A late night of rehearsal... a softball game doulbe header that hurt my knee. I'm out of wack... I need to get me some more wack somewhere.
Things felt so good there for a couple of weeks. I was on the verge of pushing my walk to a jog. I was carrying 5 lb weights with me on my walks and who knows.. some muscular tone might have been the reason for my stall in weight loss.. but anyway...it's not just that...
I haven't picked up a bible or a "spiritual book" in 2 weeks...my spiritual health is suffering through this time.
I'm feeling frantic, stalled, indicisive, overwhelmed, lazy, stupid, angry and frustrated with myself.
I got back on the eating part of the program on Monday.. I weighed 336 this morning... that seems aweful fast but anyway.. I've got to get me a new employee, get back on the walking and reading.. but I've got a family reunion coming on June 27th.. that's throwing some stress in to my life.. I'm looking forward to it but I just hope it all goes well.
Praying for God's peace, wisdom, and joy. I know when I get back on the program..even if my weight loss stalls.. I feel better... dang knee. If it hurts more this Thursday night I'm blowing off softball and focusing on walking and dancing. :-) >
Send me some wack if you have any..